What a difference a year can make.

About a year ago I started writing in a journal and never thought I’d keep up with doing it for very long. Traditionally in the past I would start a journal and stop a few days in and never make it past a few weeks. This time I wanted it to be different, I wanted to be different. I was also looking for a creative outlet to help with my anxiety and panic disorder that didn’t require a lot of space or supplies. In college I took Book Arts and loved creating art books. I didn’t have the space to make books but I thought that I could combine my interests in book arts and the bullet journal ideas that everyone was/is crazy about and create my own art journal. I gathered up some supplies that I already had and bought a dotted journal and have been doing it ever since. Now I look forward to my time working in my journal. It’s my time to process the day and all the thoughts and feelings that I’m battling with inside my head. The act of getting my thoughts and feelings on paper while also creating something has been one of the most beneficial things I’ve done for my growth and healing besides going to therapy.
I think I’ll always continue to keep a journal in some form because its become ingrained into who I am and how I process my thoughts and feelings. Before journaling I kept things in and just stuffed all the negative thoughts and feelings inside me and then they eventually exploded one day when someone looked at me wrong. Now instead I get all that stuff out on paper and to be honest I’d be embarrassed if anyone ever read it. But this way I’m less likely to keep things inside and journaling has also helped me worth through things from my past too.
Even now I am struggling and questioning my place in life but then I think about where I was just a year ago and I know that eventually things will work out the way they are supposed to and instead of fighting it the whole way I’m going to let go and try to enjoy the ride a little.

crystal xo